Healthy Relationships: From a distance.

Dear Mark: There's this guy I saw at the grocery store (he works there). I see him looking at me the whole time I shop. He gives me a small look like his eyelids are half closed and he turns his eyes at me. If I look at him, he turns his eyes to look down.

Last week, as I was leaving the store, I saw him sitting in his car looking at me. He just kept looking at me as I was putting the bags in my car. As I drove away, I passed his car and he turned his head back to look at the rearview mirror. After I passed him, he continued to look at me as I was driving away.

The next time I went into the store, I got the same behavior from him. I am single and definitely open for dating. And this guy is pretty cute. But I don't want to embarrass myself either. What are your thoughts on this? Sincerely, Susan

Hey Susan, It sounds like this guy might have some sort of feelings for you. What those feelings are exactly remains to be seen. It seems pretty likely that it may be some sort of a crush he has on you. He may be interested, but watching you from a distance may be all he is capable of. You mentioned you thought he was cute. Perhaps he has found you glancing at him and is just returning the favor.

There is another scenario, however. It's more along the lines of a cautionary tale. Be wary of strangers. More likely than not, they are harmless. He most likely thinks you're attractive and just wants to get to know you. But please be careful. If you make contact, make sure you meet in a public place and get to know each other first. Even have a friend meet him or at least have his phone number just in case. You really cannot be too careful in these sorts of situations.

My advice would be to approach this man and see what kind of "vibe" you get from him. If it is friendly, proceed with a mix of hope and caution. There is an odd similarity in male mating practices between the "I want to kill you" look and the "I want to have sex with you" look. Your success rate with men will be somewhat contingent upon becoming proficient in discerning between the two. If he is not receptive cut your losses and move on. Good luck.